#sometimes we all just need a bit of vicarious comforting from our favourite fictional character

[johnny-and-dora]

we can stay here (and laugh away the fear)

93. “i believe in you” requested by no-one i just really wanted to do this one in which amy's confidence takes a knock and jake whips out the official jake peralta fiancé experience guide to help her out. (pre 5x15)

read on ao3 -

Something is bothering Amy.

Jake goes over the facts one more time in his head, sneaking a furtive glance at his fiancée over the top of his computer screen – his first clue was when she came out of Holt’s office twenty minutes ago with a slight slump in her shoulders, a blatant violation of the “Posture” section of her mentorship binder.

She’s taking twice as long as usual to do her paperwork and it doesn’t even look like she’s enjoying it. Her brows are furrowed and her lips pursed in this totally adorable yet slightly worrying way and she’s tapping absentmindedly on her desk in thirty-second increments, meaning she’s desperate for a shame cigarette. Conclusive evidence that something is stressing her out.

(The thing that’s stressing her out might be him seeing as he’s been bragging about a major drug bust he just pulled off for most of the morning; but he also brought her coffee and did the dishes last night and laundry mountain is now more of a laundry molehill, so he’s pretty sure he’s in the clear.)

They don’t call him Jacob Sherlock Peralta for nothing (no-one calls him that, but he’s still confident it’ll catch on eventually). And though he can’t figure out what it is just yet, he’s determined to solve the case of why the love of his life can’t even enjoy her paperwork.

To: Amy Santiago, 12:23 u ok? need a break???

He tries to act as nonchalant as possible but can’t bring himself to miss the tiny smile that flickers on her face upon seeing the text. He pretends to be absorbed in the criminal database he’s scouring while he waits for his phone to buzz.

From: Amy Santiago, 12:24 I’m fine.

He shoots her an overdramatic disbelieving look over his monitor and she rolls her eyes.

From: Amy Santiago, 12:24 Okay, maybe not totally fine. Can we talk? x

To: Amy Santiago, 12:25 meet me in evidence lockup 5 mins x

She’s there when he quietly closes the door behind him a few minutes later; it causes such a strong swell of deja vu, memories of so, a lot of change around here and more recently Jake Peralta, I will marry you that it almost overwhelms him. So he does what he always does.

“Thought I might find you in here.” He jokes – she laughs a little but her body language is so tightly wound that he moves almost on pure instinct to give her a hug. The way the tension instantly disappears from her frame as she buries her face in his shirt tells him he must be doing something right.

“You okay?” He says softly, pressing a kiss to her forehead; she looks up at him, hands still snaked neatly around his waist, and he’d let all the criminals in holding walk free if it would make her feel better.

(Not that it would – he’s never been that good with metaphors, but the sentiment remains.)

“Fine. Really, I just…I needed this.”

“You sure?” He asks, and he can tell when he only gets a sigh in response that he’s going to have to break out the Official Jake Peralta Fiancé Experience Guide to Comforting Amy Santiago, The Greatest Woman In The Universe. (The title still needs some work.)

“It’s just…the results of the sergeant’s exam come out this week. Holt just told me.”

“Oh.” He says, trying to connect the dots. “That’s a good thing, though, right? You’ve been waiting for ages - and you totally aced that test, Ames.”

“Yeah. Maybe.” She shakes her head, biting her lip. “I just can’t help thinking – what if I don’t get it?” He prepares a reprisal of the speech he made that day on the roof, but she continues. “And what if I do, and I can’t handle it? What if it’s way too much work or my squad doesn’t respect me or I get transferred or…“ It’s a spiral, he realises – a knock to her confidence that breaks his heart a little.

Fortunately, it’s also something he knows exactly how to handle, and it involves one of his top five favourite activities.

“Have I ever told you,” Jake says as he takes her hands in his, “that you are perfect?”

Amy predictably rolls her eyes at his blatant cheesiness, but the hint of a smile that appears on her face is more than enough fuel for him to keep going.

“Well, you are. Perfect! Perfecter than perfect.”

“It’s more perfect, babe.” She says, and a million years ago in 2013 he’s wearing ill-fitting sandals and Captain Holt is disappointed in him and Jake just wants to find a way to rip through the very fabric of space and time, grab his past self by the shoulders and tell him that using correct grammar is going to get him some of the best sex in his life in the future so he better start learning now.

(And also, as an afterthought, that everything is going to be okay.)

“Actually, no.” He grins, shit-eating Peralta special. “Because in the language that I just made up, perfecter is actually more perfect that more perfect. Perfecter than perfect is a special term invented for the light of my life, the most amazing woman in the history of the universe, Amy Santiago.”

She prods him lightly in the shoulder, now completely failing to tamper down a warm smile. “Dork.”

“Queen of the cosmos. The one true love of my life. Divine goddess of wisdom and beauty.” He punctuates every new fancy title he gives her with a kiss – one to her neck, one to her jaw, one to her cheek, and gains a great sense of satisfaction from the way she melts into him, humming in content.

He initially thinks he’s won this round, but she still looks way too stressed out, exercising a relatively new nervous habit that makes his heart stutter – twisting the engagement ring on her finger.  

“You don’t believe me.” He pouts and she sighs, briefly retreating someplace he can’t follow her. When she finally returns his gaze she’s all dark doe eyes and he’s sure there’s space somewhere in his Addams Family themed wedding vow rap for one more promise; a commitment to convincing her she’s more than enough for the rest of his life.

“Nobody’s perfect, Jake.”

“Yeah, no doy. That’s why you’re perfecter than perfect, obviously.”

“I just…I worry, you know? I feel like I need to prove myself.”

“I know. But Ames, you have proven yourself a billion trillion times over. I told you when I proposed, you’re the best detective I know…and there’s no-one else that deserves this more and no-one else that is going to be a better sergeant than you are.”

“Thank you for being perfect.”

“I am flawless, yes.” He grins, but it soon turns into something softer. “I believe in you 100%, okay, babe? You’re going to be an amazing leader.”

“I love you.”

“Love you too. I also feel like the word perfect is beginning to lose all meaning.”

“Oh, there’s a name for that!” She pauses, lost in thought, and sometimes he wishes you could take package holidays in other people’s brains just because he’d love to walk among the endless bookshelves of infinite knowledge in hers, and sometimes he just gets lost in endless endearment for how much of a nerd his fiancée is. This time is definitely the latter.

She snaps her fingers after a moment, eyes bright – “Semantic satiation!”

“That’s so hot.” He smirks, and he’s only half joking. They share a chaste, probably work-appropriate kiss – Jake’s tempted to deepen it, but also not totally convinced that the ghost of Dozerman isn’t frowning down upon them right now so decides to keep it PG. It doesn’t matter anyway – they’re soon rudely interrupted by a loud rap on the door which makes them both jump apart.

“You two horndogs finished being gross in there? I need a case file.”

They both answer with similar cries of indignation and disgust, which just elicits a sharp laugh from Rosa.

“Whatever. Just tell me when you’re done.” She walks away, and Jake laughs at the shade of red Amy has turned, earning him a well-deserved punch in the shoulder.

“So, you wanna get lunch? I happen to know a polish place recommended by a pretty dope soon-to-be sergeant.” Her face lights up and in just a few short months they’re going to be married and Jake has never been more excited for the rest of his life to start.

“Sounds perfect.”